iceberg.

I'm not feeling too profound tonight. Actually, I'm feeling quite tired. The past two weeks have been pretty killer with lots of stuff to work on and too much to do on the weekends. Between our homecoming weekend and going snowboarding, I have missed seeing those whom I enjoy the most up until last weekend, and I am wearing out. School life is picking up. Calculus is hard again, physics is frustrating to the point of anger, and my bedtime has once again shifted back to an average of 12 or 12:30 (no good). Socially, I have had some interesting weekends spending, surprisingly, a lot of time with GDS friends at homecoming festivities. The game was fun and the dance was actually very fun and relaxed, but still, little sleep. The next weekend, after much deliberating over a time to go, I went snowboarding with my cousin and his two sons, both about 10 yrs old. I love snowboarding, and it was a great time riding, but the boys wore me out and I was very tired of talking by the end of the weekend. My weeks have been filled with mindless noise, and I am feeling the weight of it all. As baseball now is starting up, my free time is slowly closing and the light under the doorway is dimming. At Core, the video on silence really hit me hard in the midst of my busyness, even in the context of church events and worship practices. I sat, in silent reflection, and saw all that I pack my life with. Looking over the next two weeks, things are not looking good and I feel like I've become a giant iceberg, slowly floating along, completely unaware of all that his beneath. In my tiredness, I enter survival mode, only moving to get through the next 40 minutes of spanish, or trying to survive the last 20 minutes of batting practice. I'm not sure quite why I wanted to write this out, but I'm not going to provide any happy Bible verse to end this with, that would be untrue of my sentiments. I will just leave you where I am at, waiting for the ice to break.

What is that sound high in the air

Murmur of maternal lamentation

Who are those hooded hordes swarming

Over endless plains, stumbling in cracked earth

Ringed by the flat horizon only

What is the city over the mountains

Cracks and reforms and bursts in violet air

Falling towers

Jerusalem Athens Alexandria

Vienna London

Unreal

A woman drew her long black hair out tight

And fiddled whisper music on those strings

And bats with baby faces in the violet light

Whistled, and beat their wings

And crawled head downward down a blackened wall

And upside down in air were towers

Tolling reminiscent bells, that kept the hours

And voices singing out of empty cisterns and exhausted wells.

In this decayed hole among the mountains,

In the faint moonlight, the grass is singing

Over the tumbled graves, about the chapel

There is the empty chapel, only the wind's home.

It has no windows, and the door swings,

Dry bones can harm no one.

Only a cock stood on the rooftree

Co co rico co co rico

In a flash of lightning. Then a damp gust

Bringing rain

(From T.S. Eliot's "The Wasteland")

nate.