Vanished.

For month's now, I have been searching for something that I lost. Mid-summer, it seemed to have walked off and left me for some other home, probably one superior. A warmer exterior, maybe more inviting, definitely more interesting, my Loss was probably searching for something unique. Some say adventure and risk call these things away from loved ones and from warmth. The anticipation of freedom and the possibility of hazards are far more enticing than my normal, traditional existence. Though I searched, it was to no avail. Days passed with no great luck, and the void in my being was not filled--no, it widened. I looked across Greensboro, but my item had since skipped town. Off to New York, I heard from it no more, the void grew to consume me and my emotions turned to sadness. Quickly, the feeling of loss mutated from sorrow into rage, and into a righteous anger at the callous heartlessness of my Loss. Oh, the audacity! Leaving me so lonely and broken, holding only the remains of my shattered heart. Shards of emotion lay devastated in my palms, the only remains of my so carefully opened heart. I trusted my Loss, I trusted so much. The many hours spent talking, eating, laughing, being merry, are now nothing more than dust crumbling through my fingers off of the cracked pieces of my heart. My heart, so gradually and carefully given to her, was smashed onto the rocks of disdain.

It could not end there, so hopelessly broken. My Loss, not so far away, began to return. Hoping for renewal, ready with forgiveness, I ran to embrace my Loss, and we were together once more. It was truly wonderful--laughing, talking, and sharing our emotions once again. So blindly did I run back again, sprinting gleefully towards the cliff from which I was to fall, once again deceived. I have asked myself, was it genuine? Did my Loss really want reconciliation. We can never know intentions, but once again I was thrust into a world of loss and distrust. For long now, I have been bitter. Many times, my mouth has opened with curses and jokes towards my Loss. How can I have been so unloving? Those who know me probably know the Loss, and the way that I speak of her. I am so guilty. I have been wronged, there is no doubt, but how can I be so unloving? Jokes and insults are much closer in my mind than words of warmth or kindness. I am quick to speak, and quick to anger, both the antonyms of love. For those who understand, I apologize to you for the times I have spoken ill of her. She is Papa's beloved and for that alone, I have no right to demean or insult his beautiful creation. Undoubtedly, more jokes will slip out, but I pray that the pure water of His forgiveness will begin to cleanse me of my petty grudges. Clean me of my impurities and my faults, and forgive me, for I have sinned against your beloved.


"He who restrains his words has knowledge, And he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding." Proverbs 17:27

nate.

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On the Gambling of Spiders

Lying is a dirty gamble. The Russian Roulette of relationships, you never know when the lie will become uncovered. Must you give up the game when pinned to the wall? No, throw again, make another lie; you might win this time. This time you could be home free. Win the Jackpot and leave. What a relief. Soon enough, however, you'll be back at the tables drooling for another roll, new lies to satisfy your cravings. You lust for larceny. You dive for deceit. You will thrust your words through the epidermis, between the ribcage, and straight into the lungs; and with a new stab of malice, you tear the heart from cartilage, leaving its owner slashed with the sharp words of deceit.

Now, victorious in the Casino of Lies, you crawl through the dark opening, back into the cupboard. Your mouth drips with the blood of your victims, fresh from the open wounds caused by your pretense and trickery. Oh, for remorse! But no, you simply go back to spinning your web, your web of lies. The higher you go, the more intricate the pattern, but the faster you go, the more muddled the strands. Mucus drips onto the dishes over which you hover, suspended by the sticky residue coming from your abdomen. Careless of the ones you affect, cold-hearted towards the now heartless friends you used to cling to. They are gone. You have eaten them alive. Drunken on the elixir called deception, you knife and you stab, until all that is left in your friends are sparse drops of blood and good-will, laid waste by your treachery.

"Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive"

Flee from spiders, the gambling vermin drunk on lies and deception. Cleave to close friends, true friends. Friends who encourage and lift you up.

Be Wary

nate.

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An Ode to Christmas Cheer

(sung to the tune of O' Christmas Tree)

I have exams this awesome week
We get to study calc
My teachers give some awesome tests
but nothing like exams

I study long and hard all night
We worry lots and fill with fright

O exam week, O exam week
How lovely are your days


Thank you very much, I'll be here all week

Ha

nate.

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Holiday Mystery

As annual winter festivities grow closer and closer, the spirit of the unknown has begun to consume me with the holiday spirit. Now our den is filling with that wonderful evergreen aroma mixed with some peppermint and warm cookies wafting in from the kitchen. The red on my face slowly retreats from my cheeks as I step from the blistering cold into the confines of my home. Since the weather outside is frightful, the fire of home is so delightful, and the warmth of family becomes sweeter and sweeter. School work is more and more forgotten, as the callings of a good novel and some chilled eggnog pull me from numbers and symbols into a world of fiction.

Walking out of my white garage, I enter into the bleak atmosphere of white sky and brown trees whose leaves have fled into the pile in our coul-de-sac. The once vibrant yellows and reds have been washed from the panorama, and the Great Artist paints with new emotions--desolation with a hint of homeliness. Christmastime is the season of home and family. Outside our wooden front door, Nature's beast rears its ugly head to form a sneering glare; he challenges us to face him and his icy breath or his spindly fingers as barren trees. We celebrate, enjoy our company, and feast ourselves on the chocolate, the gravy, the peppermint, the ginger bread and hundreds of other flavors, never once finding need to fear the depression of our winter surroundings. Riding home from school today lost in Coldplay's ethereal landscapes, I felt.

My warm Buick was suddenly attacked by a torrent of emotion, in which I felt the great Holiday mystery. How can we be so warm, when everywhere it is cold? Our hands are warmed by the quiet blaze in the hearth, our stomachs by the dark heat of hot chocolate and flavored coffee, and our hearts by the company of our dearest friends and family. There is no question that we are warm, but there is such danger! Nature pounds on my door and breaks into my house to steal warmth and happiness, to compromise those things for which we fought so dearly with our central heating system. It is, however, not the defeat of warmth when we feel this cold, for cold is really the absense of heat. Cold does not exist!! To this, we must applaud, for the Great Artist has no true enemy, no foe to hold him back. Cold is not real, and that is what we celebrate.

Evil is simply the absense of good, and God is omnipresent. There is no chance for cold darkness when we are wrapped in the love of Papa. The Holiday mystery is but the mystery of godliness--how our Great Lover choses to enclose us with his great arms, no matter how cold me might be. He absorbs our cold, so that we might be warm. I don't understand, but I love it. Just like I love the holidays.

nate.

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Grrrr

As a correlary to Chelsea's post on Calculus, I felt compelled to write a biting critique of my Calculus class. Calculus is:

Hard to Understand
Work-Intensive
Hard to Visualize
Hard to Conceptualize
Not Rewarding
Stressful

Hmm... there are six negative aspects of Calculus, now I will list the benefits of the class:

......
.....

Funny thing, I can't seem to think of any. There is always the argument that this class is building perseverance, problem solving, and a good work ethic--a theory to which I fully ascribe for math in general. Calculus, however, is frustrating. I have unleashed more anger as a result of Calculus than any class ever before. More grunts of frustration, more hitting things, more screaming in irritation and writhing in agony than ever before. Hard work has taken me this far in Math, but I feel my grasp on Math slowly oozing from my fingers into a pile of rotten mush that is Calculus. The steaming heap of rot has caused me more headaches than are healthy and has not done much to make me a better person. I'm just a more angry person. Second semester, please hasten so I will not have to suffer under such pressure any longer. Exams, then its cruising time.

nate.

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A New Day

The red-tinted sun slowly sneaked over drowsy, snow-covered peaks as a new day began to break over the little town of Paradise. Joseph Greene lifted his head from the folds of his Bible and spoke a quiet "Amen" as he smiled softly at Papa's wonderful masterpiece--daybreak. Streaks of light rushed into the small kitchen, and he moved his eyes to stare out the window. It was an emotive sight, as the mountain peaks were gilded with the golden luster of a fresh sunrise. Day had arrived. The dusty surface of main street was quickly thrust airborne as the workday accelerated into movement. Joseph's countenance, which had been so highly raised, became sullen, as the workday was all business and often full of stress.

Somewhere across town, a car screeched to a destructive crunch, and someone's collie began to bark. Joseph let out a deep sigh and shook his head at his ever-shifting world.
Two years ago, there were no cars here! Oh, how peaceful was life then. No noise, no accidents, no trouble...
Nevertheless, he pushed open his ambled down the wooden steps to his white Accord parked on the street. As he reached for the handle, he noticed an unusual light in his car. Joseph squinted through the window, only to find a small pile of glass in the passenger seat, and a spot of light rushing in through the whole in his back window.
Are you kidding me?? What have I done to deserve this? If I find out who did this...

nate.

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Showdown

In a small town in the lonely deserts of Nevada, a small town existed. Daily, the town played a quiet part in the scheme of life, but in universal perspective, each door slam and every spoken word had a benign significance--a deeply personal experiment by Papa, the great Lover. This town, (comparable to the namesake town in the works of Ted Dekker), was the center of an test to replay history--to rewrite the history of the World. As you, the reader will discover in the subsequent episodes, our quaint homestead named Paradise is not as docile as may seem, in fact the town will soon become quite potent.

We begin our journey creaking in a wooden rocker on the front porch of an old white house. Staring off into the sandy dusk of another falling day, a shadow falls over the sickly grass inhabiting the cracks of an old concrete road. A gust of wind lifts the hair of Joseph Greene, a kindly old man with a heart for the well-being of every man and woman in the town. As the sun stumbles below the horizon, a dark cloud slinks over its red luminescence and the warm sun grows strangely cold. The main street shadow becomes ever shorter, as the black shifts into the shape of an old cowboy hat. As Joseph slowly raises his eyes, the dark newcomer is already staring, with the cold stare. We will soon be introduced to this character, as Lucious Oscuro will soon become a strong force within the innocent town of Paradise. Evil has arrived.

nate.

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Abide.

Like birds we flock to some new food,
Our bellies aching for new hope
We seek to find that which is good
This cannot simply be a rope

A fibrous string formed in a loop
To cease the endless ache of life,
Nor does our goodness form a hoop
For goals and works that are our tithe

Nay!

His grace gives us a life to live
His love is our most needed source
Of happiness and will to give
From what we have with no remorse

Abide in him till your life ends
He will sustain you to the end

nate.

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Thanks Guys

Its really been a good weekend.
I'm not one to diary my everyday journeys in my blog, but this weekend is worth the splurge. After a few weeks that have been mediocre and not so fun, a variety of my good friends have made this weekend awesome. Nothing incredibly unique, but I am a part of things again! Friday - played Rock Band with some amigos from GDS. That was awesome. Saturday - went to the Northwest soccer game, then went to Aaron's and chilled with the jubilant lovebirds. That was awesome. Thank you for letting me hang out with y'all! It was fun. Sunday (today) - went mountain biking with some guys over at Bur-Mill. We tried to kill ourselves on bikes. That was awesome. Thank you to my friends for making my weekend awesome, it means a lot to me.

nate.

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Congratulations!

I'm so proud of our dear country. It is no small feat to accomplish what occurred yesterday. Beyond all yard-signs, opinions, and heated arguments, there is no denying the magnitude of yesterday's election. Not only did we wake up to see another day, but we, the people of the United States (well, most (I can't vote..)) came together to pick who we thought should be our next President. Over two years of printing t-shirts, buttons, and many phone calls has culminated in a simple vote -- Obama or McCain (and don't forget Nader!..) Whether or not you agree with the result of the election, the mere fact that it happened is incredible. We do not live in South America, where the "election" is a new military general marching his mob up the Capitol steps. We also do not live in England, where a new monarch is chosen from the royal blood line. (Granted, the king/queen is now honorary)

Many people that I know do not agree with the elected candidate, and that is fine. Now that the time for deliberation has come and gone, however, we must follow the results accordingly by treating our new president with all-due respect. Barack Obama is the first African-American president. Our country is now culturally centuries beyond where we were only 50 years ago, when blacks were discouraged from voting and segregated from society. No one can deny his great success. Not only this, but he has mobilized the American populace through an awe-inspiring grassroots campaign strategy that has paid off with the presidency. Not only is he the first African-American president, but he has shown us, yet again, how American can so calmly and mostly painlessly experience a transition of power. Once again, there has been no coup-de-etat; no military storming our beloved capitol. The beauty of our American experiment is our ability to graciously pass authority to another party and ideology with minimal conflict.

Think on our election with pride. Don't criticize the president for what he hasn't done yet. Don't be Johnny Raincloud, but be optimistic and hope the best for our country under our new president.

Change has come, no question about it. Now comes the trial -- Will it last?










nate.

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called Sons of God" (Matt. 5:9)

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Perfect Love.

We know what we want. Many of us make lists of characteristics, many daydream, but all aspire for the ideal form of our mate who is floating somewhere in the ethereal land of men and women. There is a Mr. Right and a corresponding figure for us strapping young lads. Why do we compromise? Women, you deserve so much more than we give you, and many times more than you settle for. All men are not self-centered and morally invasive, there are boys in this world who are waiting for the women who wants a real man. One who is worth the wait. What have we become? The sense of intimacy in relationships now corresponds with the emotions that our loved one evokes. Sure, by no means is emotion bad or always deceitful. It is, however, the source of the many problems with our society's dating culture. Do you wonder why so many high school relationships fizzle out like a dimming sparkler on the 4th? It is due to emotion. One or two people have said that they love the emotions in a relationship, and rightly they should, because that is what God has planned for marriage! The emotional upwellings within high school relationships are but small windows into the emotional connection within marriage. When we experience a watered down form of this emotion, we are just playing in the bathtub. The water is nice and warm, and it is nice-that is until you have to get out. Until you have to go back into the cool air of your house. What we are missing out on is like the ocean. We could wait, and then go to the beach. There there is no bathtub-there is the vast, blue expanse of sparkling laughter.

The ocean to me is always smiling. Sunsets at the coast are glorious, and being at the beach brings me joy, and I know that Jesus looks out in wonder at the same majestic scenes. God knows how we need emotional satisfaction, but he wants us to wait for the final act. Each interaction that we have with someone leaves a small piece of us with them. It is like we are each a composition of light, and as we are with someone, the lights dance and swirl together as the two beings are united in a unified state of being. This could be a simply hello, but God has created each of us with our unique essence, and as we divulge more and more of that to people throughout our life, we are giving out light. In a dating relationship, we are pouring out light. Two "lovers" often share their deepest desires, their highest aspirations, and their most vulnerable moments with each other, and their lights begin to become indiscriminately mixed. All of a sudden, the lights are unnaturally ripped apart, and the reaction causes a loss of light for both individuals. They will never be the same, as they each now own a small piece of the other's soul. How can anyone go into a relationship casually, arrogantly thinking that it will be the couple to break the cliche of high school dating.

These light reactions, they are no more than common interactions; two friends exchange greetings. It is common for us to spread our light; we are sprinkling small drops of our personal "essence" on someone else. Almost like lingering cologne, your light will remain on the people you touch and keep you on their mind. The beauty of our essence is in the fact that we are complete with Jesus. I need not and cannot be anyone other than me. When we choose to be a part of God's story, he sends Sarayu, his spirit, to live in us and to inspire us. Our physical body is what we most commonly live by, but we also have our mind in which we usually reside. Most interesting is our spirit, the place that we seldom experience consciously, but it is the place where Sarayu is most present. We must fill our spirit with the love of God, so that our light can be all the more mature and brilliant. God does not clean up our act, he develops each of our respective essences into brilliant masterpieces that will subconsciously affect all those around us. Isn't it a beautiful mess?

But I diverge. High school relationships are not bad, but why rush them? We hurtle fullspeed into a relationship that more resembles a marriage or a romance, where all we need is a friendship. The most fulfilling relationship with a guy or girl will be experiencing the valley with them--living the daily drudge alongside your best friend. Contrived love and romance have no place for now, we must learn to love outside of our emotions. Love from the depths of our spirit, out of the light which Sarayu so delightfully enriches for us. Pursue the heart of the one whom you seek, you will find there what you seek--love. If Sarayu is at the heart of the one whom you seek, then as you both draw near to Sarayu, you will draw near to each other. Seek not romance, seek Sarayu, seek Papa.

Seek Jesus

nate.

"God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. By this love is perfected" (1 John 4:16-17)

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A Pretty Face, the Kind You'd Find on Someone That Could Save

"Remember, the people who know me [Jesus] are the ones who are free to live and love without any agenda."

"Is that what is means to be a Christian?" It sounded kind of stupid as Mack said it, but it was how he was trying to sum up everything in his mind.

"Who said anything about being a Christian? I'm not a Christian"

The idea struck Mack as odd and unexpected and he couldn't keep himself from grinning. "No, I suppose you aren't"

They arrived at the door of the workshop. Again Jesus stopped. "Those who love me come from every system that exists. They were Buddhists or Mormons, Baptists or Muslims, Democrats, Republicans and many who don't vote or are not part of any Sunday morning or religious institutions. I have followers who were murderers and many who were self-righteous. Some are bankers and bookie, Americans and Iraqis, Jews and Palestinians. I have no desire to make them Christian, but I do want to join them in their transformation into songs and daughters of my Papa, into my brothers and sisters, into my Beloved."

"Does that mean," asked Mack, "that all roads will lead to you?"

"Not at all," smiled Jesus as he reached for the door handle to the shop. "Most roads don't lead anywhere. What it does mean is that I will travel any road to find you."


This blew my mind.
You should read The Shack by William Young, from where this excerpt is taken.
It is a book that will revitalize your insight into the heart of God,
It will make you yearn for the presence of Papa.

nate.

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Subterranean Homesick Alien

I'm no longer busy. Cross Country has ended. My college application for UNC is almost finished. I'm caught up with my school work. I've had more time for friends and free time, but feel a void. There is a darkness which is suddenly revealed. In the space left by my former stress and busyness, I have found a subversive loneliness and coldness which now entraps me. Where the mediocre warmth of my world used to be enough to help me through, my need for a affirmation is all the more amplified with the chilly fall air. Where a kind blue sky calls warmly to me, the wispy clouds droop and sulk, while they all but weep at the changing of times and the coming of winter. The fun and energy of summer is setting like the sun I now see fleeing from our town. I have always loved autumn--the crisp air, the energy of change. All of a sudden, this year is different. Changes have come, and I am not where I was last year. I yearn for Papa; I hear Yeshua passionately woodworking in his shed, as he prepares me for an exciting new season of life. As Oswald Chambers says, the true essence of life is not the mountain-tops, it is when we reside in the valley, when we come down from ecstasy and enlightenment, and face the slow canter at which we normally live. Like returning from the lake or the beach, we descend from glorious existence into our strikingly normal being. I want more. I want joy. I want exhilarating friendships. And he knows these things. He knows what I need. Papa puts me where he knows I need to be. So I trudge on, through the shadow in which I now reside. In that, I believe the shadow proves the sunshine--that our seasons of cold, leafless trees are followed by glorious blooms of color and pleasure.

Let me be Your clay, broken and formed into a new being.
Let the old pass away, let the new come forth.
Let my deadened leaves fall away, and Your Spirit bring forth new life

nate.

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Pure Majesty

Love, unconquerable
Waster of rich men, keeper
Of warm lights and all night vigil
In the soft face of a girl:
Sea-wanderer, forest visitor!
Even the pure Immortals cannot escape you
And mortal man, in his one day's dusk,
Trembles before your glory

(Taken from Antigone by Sophocles)

Ancient literature has power. The unseeming majesty of complicated literature can overcome the most unsuspecting individual, simply trying to succeed in a world full of academic rigor. Love is an incredibly entity, who can understand it? Human kind never has and can never fully comprehend the complexities and subtleties of love. From the corrosive properties of lustful desires, to the whimsical features of casual love, the world has shifted from a reverent appreciation of the majesty of the deepest loves, to an irreverant exploitation of the joys found in love. In this small moment of your time spent reading my thoughts alloted in HTML boxes, savor the pure delight of love in its original form (from the brilliance of Sophocles) and see the life that ancient writing brings to ideas that have since grown cold and inert.

-nate

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Throw Away Your Washing Machine

"Ah what a relief it is, to be in Christ He's the life that I need to live" Woah! Stop! "the life that I need to live"... what does that even mean? This is a bumping song (Relief by Trip Lee), but I wish we could rearrange some things. Lets see...

How bout "We live the life we need to live, so we can be in Christ... and be relieved.." Hmm (fail.) But, isn't that how you feel a lot of times? Don't you feel the weight of "needing" to do something to make yourself clean? I want to rest and be content in Jesus, and simply accept all that he has done for me, but I always feel the need to do something. Jesus is often my washing machine. I give him my flesh for a short time, so that he can wash it, and I can live with cleanliness for a short time (before it becomes dirty again..) That, however, is not at all how it is! Our flesh is not sinful anymore! That's not what it is. By no means will we never sin (I can attest to that), but how awesome is it that we are free from sin. Fighting the battle over sin seems like a current and future thing to me, but it has already been fought and won! We don't have to fight, we just need to "reckon ourselves dead to sin" (Rom 6), or just realize how Jesus has killed our old sin nature. We don't have to sin anymore - we have the power to choose not to sin. That's sweet.

Your identity is God. You are clean, you are holy. You are loved.

"There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ" (John 8:1)

"Jesus said to her, 'Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more.'" (John 8:11)

Throw away your washing machine, God has made you dirt-proof.

nate.

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Home Again

Following my excursion to Asia, there is nothing like hitting the play button and resuming my paused activities and friendships. I have am so very thankful for my friends; thanks guys for making me feel welcome and loved. Being back in America is weird, because I haven't been quite right until I took the slow saunter down the small hill off of Muirs Chapel; until I walked down the concrete stairs; until I passed through the familiar doors which hold the smiles and the energy of my family at the Core. At the point when I entered the Core room, my shoulders relaxed, my tiredness vanished, and I began to laugh and be merry. I was home. Seeing all those people whom I missed, life began to feel normal again. All this to say, Asia was incredible, but I am very happy to be back in the arms of my beloved friends. I think I am going to store all of you in my pocket for the remainder of my life, because I don't know what I'd do without you. Its good to be back.

nate.

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ZZZzzzz...

Welcome to a new website!!
I figured that with a new title, a new site was appropriate.
The title is easier to remember ( we pierce the darkness (<---all smashed together))
Asia is much better (I know), but please don't boycott any new stuff!
Its just like my return to all the people that I like back home, my writing is back to the things I normally write about. Things like life, and people, and God. Cool stuff like that.

Anyways...
Jetlag is a bummer..
End of story (because now, I sleep)

Namaste

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 14 - Closing Time..

Well, the end is here. It is with sadness that I write this final blog from Asia. The invasion is over, and I return home to become a regular student again, no more adventures. But, I am very excited to see everyone again! Today we had breakfast at a local hotel with all of the company teachers who are here in Indonesia. Eating here in Indonesia has been excellent, as the cost of food is dramatically lower than in the states. We have enjoyed the nice restaurants around here, at maybe ¼ of the cost of an equivalent meal in the states. Breakfast consisted of a multi-course offering of coffee, fruit, an assortment of breads, and a breakfast meat entrée, all for less than 10 dollars. It was excellent. Also, it was great to see the common bonds that the teachers had developed and the fun that they had spending time with each other. This morning was definitely a quality experience (and great food!).

The rest of my day was fairly sedentary. We were supposed to be leaving for the town that has the airport around two this afternoon, but this plan was disrupted. The man who was supposed to take us wasn’t able to go until around six, (he had some other engagement…) but we didn’t actually leave until seven. Culturally, many Asians in the South Pacific don’t have an understanding of commitments or being on time, so when he said six, it more reasonably meant around seven. We did, however, have a quiet afternoon at our guest house. My grandpa spent time with the field leaders here evaluating the work here and setting vision for the future. I, on the other hand, spent most of this afternoon finding the new blog template that you are savoring at this moment, as well as doing a little school reading for Gov’t/Econ.

My time here in Asia has been quite rewarding. Though I have been away from my schooling, there is no question that my education has continued. I have experienced many different cultures with different values and customs, but I have had great opportunities to spend time with people. Since my trip is not really from a tourist/sight-seeing perspective, I have been able to converse and spend time with all sorts of people, from government officials, to seminary presidents, to local residents. Not only have I had opportunities to experience culture, but I been able to contribute to God’s work in different countries. Blessed cannot begin to describe the way I have felt as we have visited so many different cultures and people during the past two weeks. Being able to see all that I have has touched me deeply, to see all that God has done in these people’s lives. Some of the people we have met with have worked or taught in their country for over 30 years and many are past retirement, yet continue to seek visa renewal each year. These individuals have made it their life’s purpose to show the love of our Father to the people of Hong Kong, Korea, East Asia, and Indonesia.

For me, in my idealistic bubble, it has been eye-opening to see and hear of the struggles of the work. The know that families in certain countries must be mindful of safety, especially in East Asia, has a whole different meaning once you have lived, for a few days, under the same constrictions. The blessing of American freedom of religion, as much as we bicker about that freedom, is all the more meaningful once you experience a country without freedom. When you see first-hand the effect that the DMZ has had on both Koreas, the news about the two nations is more understandable and impactful. If nothing else, this experience has most taught me how to empathize with those of different cultures. When I lived in their shoes, even just for a few days, I experienced their daily struggles and situations, and I have a better understanding of their relation to the international community. We cannot begin to become a nation that is respected internationally unless we are willing to step down off Mount Olympus and open our eyes to the cultures of different nations. America doesn’t have all the answers, and in some cases, we would do well to take note of different ways of thought. But, even if we don’t agree, we must understand. Then, and only then, can we truly be a “world power”.

I hope that y’all have enjoyed my daily updates; it has probably been more fun for me than for you. There are so many times that I have wished for a giant teleporter, to bring everyone over to see the sights and experience different elements of my trip. I have done my best to use my writing to convey these experiences, but some things transcend any description. Hopefully, you will continue to check my blog, even though it won’t be from across the world… and there might not be pictures. It is sad for me to write this, and it seems as though I am saying goodbye to someone dear. Then, however, I realize it is quite the opposite. I am returning to those who love me and have missed me (hopefully), and then I start to get excited. Jet-lag is not something I look forward too and cross-country this week will be rough, but I so look forward to seeing, and reconnecting with everyone. Facebook has kept me pretty involved, but some things just can’t be communicated by pictures and messages. If you have any questions about things, people, or places that I have experienced, feel free to send me an e-mail (nate.tilley@gmail.com). And, if you would like to hear more about anything, I’d love to spend some time talking with you, maybe over some coffee or across the phone. The next time that you will here from me, I’ll be in the land of the Free (hey that rhymes!!), so enjoy this last taste of Asia, for the Asian Invasion has ended.

To see picture from the trip, click on the pictures link at the top of the page

Nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 13 - Speaking & Eating

The end is near. Today was our last full day of business activities, and tomorrow holds only one morning engagement. Then, on Sunday I begin my trek east back to the West. It is quite appropriate that today has been a full day, as Fridays represent the end of our American work week. This morning began quite early--a solid six o'clock. Waking at this time, we set off for the seminary's morning chapel where my grandpa and I were to be guest speakers. We entered to the familiar sound of a praise band, and I was intrigued to see how American-sounding praise music has even been accommodated to Indonesian lyrics. Worship was a touching experience, to see how other cultures and languages respond to the love of God. Singing this morning was not that different from the states, but they do clap on the off-beats. Erika would be hopelessly lost.

Following worship, I went up to give my testimony. It was difficult for me to describe the work that God has done in my life to a different culture, as much of it has been philosophical, and not necessarily drastic or flashy. Though, it is my story, and I think it was interesting for them to hear some about life in the states. Speaking, however, was a very interesting experience, as I spoke through a translator. I would speak one or two sentences, and the seminary president would translate for the congregation. Nothing I have ever done in public speaking has been like this, and it really changed the way that I planned and presented my testimony. My grandfather also spoke, but he had a larger role--he preached the sermon through the translator. One thing that has amazed me on this trip is how gifted my grandpa is as a speaker. I never have heard him preach until this trip, and I'm impressed. I must have been missing out on this secret for a number of years. He, being a pastor in the Phillipines for about 17 years, was quite comfortable with the translator, and it was interesting to see them become more and more in tune as the message progressed.

In the time before lunch, we took the opportunity to talk to one of the Americans from South Dakota who teaches in the school here. Lunch this afternoon was a family-style Indonesian meal with the faculty of the seminary. Again, as with everywhere else we have been, the food was great. We had a local form of sweet and sour chicken, a vegetable stir-fry, and some mystery ball of fish, breading, and who knows what else. It was good, and that's all I that I want to know. I enjoyed talking to the president of the seminary, as his daughter is also a senior in high school, and it was very interesting to hear her college plans. Being across the world, I thought I was away from the college craze, but his daughter is also looking at schools in the area, applying for scholarships, and everything else we all do as seniors back in the states.

This afternoon, I finished all of the calculus that I was required to do (PRAISE THE LORD..), so I was very happy, to say the least. Weather here has begun to cool slightly, as it is currently raining as I sit here typing away. What is cool here is more like... say 75ish degrees in the states. Not exactly my idea of "cool", but it is a welcome change. Dinner tonight was also a welcome change, as I had the first home-cooked meal since I left the States. Two teachers in the international school had my grandpa and me over for dinner, which one of them prepared. Barbecue chicken, corn, and green beans were the dishes of choice, and it felt more familiar, more like home. I guess they are weaning me off of Asian food, preparing me for America again. What will I ever do with normal utensils? I'm sure we can find some chopsticks for me to use. This blog post is sorta like the day before the day before tomorrow, the day that will be the beginning of my return to normalcy. So, enjoy these while they last! To any GDS friends back home who stumbled his or her way onto my blog, enjoy your nice fall break and I'll see you next Tuesday...

mOrE pIcTuReS @ picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatripnate.

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 12 - Indonesia Edition

Suprise! You have pictures again, isn't it heart-warming. But really, the very nice man that we are staying with took me to a nearby camera store where I obtained a card reader and an appropriate battery charger for about 15 dollars total. Inflation is unbelievable, but I'm not complaining. Today has been a very different day, simply because of our location. Indonesia is vastly different from every other location so far. My first hint was the open hallway and the giant screen window above my bed, and, in the morning, we saw all of the palm trees. The climate here is akin to our wonderful Greensboro summer humidity, but it is like this all year here. I was told today that we are seven degrees of latitude from the equator. As we were leaving, our hosts asked if I wanted some sunscreen, to whom I respectfully declined. Even with the heat, I'll pass on the slimescreen--it is just not my cup-o-tea.

A tropical country, Indonesia is a system of hundreds of islands that are mainly low-lying and filled with palm trees, amongst other tropical greenery. The roads are yet another experience from the last countries, because the roads are filled with pot-holes and motor-bikes. Traffic is nowhere near the amount we saw in Korea or in East Asia, but evidently the holiday time has taken many people out of the cities back to their family villages. Instead, the streets are packed with motor-bikes and scooters, and Indonesians also don't have a comprehension of "reckless driving". Here it is not so much the tight merges and traffic, but the absence of lanes that causes strange traffic patterns. I think when I return to the quaint metropolis that is Greensboro, driving will be simply a mundane activity, not so exciting anymore. Maybe I’ll have to ride with J.P. a few times, just to get that feeling of speed and adventure again. :)

First this morning, I did a little school work, and then we went to meet a British couple who teaches at the international school. We had a nice time visiting with them, and we went to a local restaurant for lunch with another teacher. Surprisingly enough, most of the food here in town is fairly American, and most of the beef is imported. There is no pork—the majority religion is not really big on pork. Another thing that I really miss from the states is water. They do have water here, thankfully, but the tap-water is not potable. I never realized how much water I drink, but I miss having my nalgene poking out of my backpack whenever I need hydration. All over Asia, the people here do not drink much fluid, mainly small amounts of tea throughout the day. Never in my life have I so wished for good, clean, non-bottled water.

This afternoon, we first stopped by the school to see the campus. It was a very nice and well-maintained campus, and you can see a view of the school in the left picture. We then spent some time in the newly constructed mall here in town, to see how much Indonesia has become modernized. With such a strong religious base, (atheism is essentially illegal), it is interesting to see how much of this country’s religion is simply cultural. The true values of the people can be seen in how they spend their time and their money. Following our people-watching excursion, I spent some more time back at the house slaving over my tedious calculus homework. It seems as though the long homeworks of the last week are intended as punishment for my absence from school. Today has been mainly an opportunity to experience the culture, and there is plenty to take in. My senses have been in overload from taking into account all of the new scenery, people, and cultures. It is, however, an incredible intriguing location, and I’m pumped for the rest of my time here. Adios, hasta luego…

(We're all psyched that there are once again...) More pictures at picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatrip

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 11 - Another Day of Travel

Today has come to an interesting close. As we left East Asia this morning, we set off for the islands of Indonesia in the South Pacific. We took a very early flight from our previous location and we had to get up around 5 this morning. Long traveling plus early mornings equals a weary student attempting to finish his homework. After I cleared the sleepiness from my eyes around mid-morning, I buried my head in projectile motion equations and graphs of trigonometric functions with derivatives. Those made for a long day, let me tell you. The math for physics and the graphing we have done for math has convinced me that Calculus is straight from the devil. The TI-83 is the rebuke to said demons (thank you Texas Instruments!). Though math and physics consumed the majority of my day, it helped my sanity to make a nice dent in the pile of school work. We left Hong Kong after about 6 hours, and it was at the gate that we had our first glimpse of Indonesia.

As we began to line up for boarding, the line was filled with woman countless house maids from Hong Kong, all returning home for the end of Ramadan. It was incredible that at least three-quarters of the passengers were these women. After a short four hour flight, we arrived in Indonesia to an amazing welcome. From the air I could see fireworks shooting up across the city to celebrate the end of their month of fasting. It was quite a welcome. My first impressions of the country have been different than any other place. Since the majority religion is different, there are many more mosques and head coverings. Also, we drove by an area that has been covered by a gigantic mudslide originating from a drilling operation that penetrated a volcanic reserve (no bueno..). This happened back in 2006, but the mud is still bubbling up into homes and stores. It is a very unique problem. I am interested to see the city in daylight, but this country promises to be quite different than anything before. Until tomorrow…

On another note, there will be no more pictures temporarily for the blog. I know you are heart-broken, but I no longer have the cord to transfer these pictures, so I can’t see them either. It’s quite sad. Please speak to Father about this situation so hopefully I will get it back. Thanks.

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 10 - Giant Pandas!!

Good Morning! We've reached a double digit title, maybe we should make a cake or something. To celebrate properly for today, the desert should be in the shape of a Giant Panda, as today we visited the largest Panda Center in the world. It was incredible! We arrived at about 10am and watched a short video on the care and breeding of the Pandas, which is extensive. The pandas are specially bred, according to their strange mating behavior, which often prevents good procreation. Having a successful birth is quite a feat, and this particular center has a very high success rate for deliveries. When a mother has its first cub, the action and the new creature is so frightening to the mother that she often harms the cub, so veterinarians sometimes have to protect the baby from the mother.

Following our video education, we set off into the vast expanse of the Panda Farm to see the Pandas. At first glance, the park was a lot of greenery and not many Pandas. We walked for some time through lush bamboo forest until we reached the first enclosure for the Adult Pandas. The park constructed various enclosures throughout the park that were essentially the ideal habitats for a Panda, and usually these habitats contain one to three Pandas each. There are all sorts of things to climb on, bamboo towers, trees, bamboo forts, and the occasional tourist.. It is so fun to watch these animals in action, because they make so little action. Every movement is significant, as their source of nutrition is limited. Bamboo is their only food, and it contains so few nutrients that they must consume it almost constantly and very quickly to obtain the needed nutrition. Eating is their full time job.

In their eating, they are quite diligent, as they sat constantly eating bamboo piece-by-piece, slowly consuming their meals. The only time they didn't eat was when they were moving or sleeping. What a life... Also, these animals seem to have such great personalities, as they are quite sluggish and simply plop down on piles of bamboo. Seeing a Panda sit up is a joyous experience; i smiled everytime the great balls of fat and fur dragged their bodies into the upright position. I was fascinated to watch the consumption of bamboo. For each piece of bamboo, the Panda peels off the outer skin and bites off the moist inner stalk. It is a tedious process, but they must do this to survive. Seeing these cuddly creatures live and in person was a rewarding experience and was much fun.

After leaving the Panda Farm, we ate lunch at a nearby McDonalds (America, thank you for your world contribution...), and I spent a little time walking around the area. I found an interesting book and music store, in which I acquired an East Asian version of John Mayer's Continuum, and an excellent Asian dance cd. I couldn't leave Asia without legitimate electronic music. Then, tonight, we met with another family from the company, this time from South Africa, and ate Chinese food with them. My chopstick skills are light-years ahead of last Monday, and this meal also may have been my favorite genuine Chinese meal. Talking with the family was encouraging and it was great to hear all that Father has been doing for them here. Tomorrow, we leave quite early for our next country, this time in the South Pacific. So until tomorrrow, hakuna matada. (which means no worries)

M o r e p i c t u r e s a t picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatrip

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 9 - People, People, and More People

Good morning from East Asia! Tonight, I experienced a flash of homesickness as the residue of Fall Retreat began to leak onto facebook photo albums. My emotions began to swell as I looked back across the Atlantic to see all of my friends returning from such an awesome and rewarding trip. I have talked to our Father in the hope that Fall Retreat would be a great renewal of passions, and the little that I have heard confirms that He was listening. You all mean so much to me; I wish I could’ve been there with you. But, on another note, here I am across the world in East Asia, today setting off to see the sights. This morning we finally slept-in relatively late, at least later than the past two days of 5am wake-ups. First, we met with a local driver who was to take us around during the day, and we set off for Tian Fuguan Chang Square, a local attraction. The square held two uniquely designed spiral fountains, and a giant statue of Mao, the former leader.

The one feature that was most apparent in the city was the incredible amount of people. No where in the world have I ever seen such consistently large masses of Asians pervading an area of city. As you can see the in the above picture (click to enlarge), people filled the squares and moved throughout the city, going about their daily routine. Incredible. Also, taxi cabs in this city are an exciting exercise in adrenaline. It seems that all inhabitants of the city have created a mental block to all cohesive and orderly methods of driving. The streets are essentially a free-for-all, generally divided to the right and left sides (not necessarily always), with pedestrians constantly in the mix. When one must cross the street, he takes no heed to the color of the light, or to the position of traffic, he just goes. It really is a startling process at first. If nothing else, my invisible brake got some serious playing time today.

After lunch, we drove to a near-by Buddhist temple to see local beliefs in action. The structure and grounds of this establishment were impressive. The place was enormous; we walked through row after row of walkways and courtyards. Though its history goes back many years, the appearance was well-maintained. Especially the gardens, trees, and pathways are beautifully designed and maintained, and are filled with exotic plant life. Also, deep inside, the Buddhist priests had set up an area of incense and candles for anyone to use. It was so sad to see many young individuals come and try to speak to their divine one, but they were missing their Father, who loves them. Their devotion and respect were inspiring, as many Americans don’t experience that kind of passion for their Father. Also, I would love to have Westover come to observe the setting. Forget the new building; we need a temple like this.

Following our temple excursion, the driver took us to meet the family of one my Grandpa’s co-workers. The family consists of one daughter and three sons, one of whom cannot walk. By interacting with this individual, by helping him out of the car, by seeing his joy regardless of hard circumstances, I was humbled. I thank our Father that I have the use of my legs, and I can’t imagine what that boy must go through; I hurt for him. His happiness and laughter, however, were an inspiration to me and I’m so happy that I was able to spend time with him. Tonight was so much fun; to be a friend to younger ones who adore me as if I were their own brother. Giving piggy-back rides, getting pinched and tickled, and answering a thousand questions were small sacrifices for the reward of their love and admiration. Little kids are so much fun. Until tomorrow…


More pictures at picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatrip

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 8 - Sitting in an Airport...

My apologies for two things. First my tardiness with respect to the date of this post. Obviously it is not Day 8, as I have posted 8 & 9 both today (how can this be?!?). Also, this day was pretty bland. We are on a plan through Cathay Pacific in order to get a reduced rate, but we have to go back to HK before leaving for each new destination. So, today, we returned to HK and then sat in the nice red lounge chairs plugged into the nearby wall outlet for the next 7 hours. The most exciting thing that happened today (besides my calculus hw :) ) was our boarding pass for East Asia through DragonAir. Seeing as it is a only a partner to Cathay Pacific, they couldn't give us a boarding pass, but there was also no desk for DragonAir in the Seoul Airport... So, in Hong Kong we had to go out of the HK airport, get a boarding pass (which was an ordeal), then go back through security, and finally we could go to our gate.

For the next 6 hours, absolute max & mins with respect to the FDT & SDT, acceleration vectors, debate transcripts, and hours of music were the fillers for my time spent in the airport. Finally we were able to depart and we safely arrived at our next destination. A short taxi drive, and a long conversation away, we made it into our hotel room for the night. Our check-in at the front desk was an interesting exercise in gesturing and body language, eventually resulting in a white room key and two beds. The picture to the left is our intriguing balcony light, one of which accompanies each room in the hotel. Sounds like quite an interesting day, huh? It was about as intersting for me, but it is a small price to pay for an incredible experience in Eastern Culture. Hasta manana!....

More pictures at picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatrip

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 7 - Into the Jaws of Communism

Greetings from the free country of South Korea. Today I have spent time approaching, and eventually crossing into Communist North Korea, and, no, I did not attempt defection. Democracy and Capitalism have been great friends of mine, and I much prefer them to their red cousin. This morning, we set off to see the Korean De-militarized Zone at the 38th Parallel which separates the North from the South. The DMZ was established after the Armistice agreement, signed in 1953 by Kim
il-Sung and the S. Korean president after the Korean war. Today we first visited the area called the JSA, or Joint-Security Area, which can be seen in the picture of the blue buildings.


Buildings in blue are S. Korean, and the silver buildings are N. Korean, and the building named T-2 is the building where Armistice talks and formal meetings of N & S are held. Security inside the JSA is on perpetual high alert, as can be seen in the above picture of the N. Korean guard. We were able to enter T-2 and step across into Communist country. For today, we got to go red. When inside this area, we were not allowed to communicate in anyway, verbal or non-verbal, to the N. Koreans, as those actions could potentially be used as propaganda. When N. Koreans are within their safe-houses, we are are told, they, however, will guesture, taunt, and demean American military and visitors from the safety of their territory. Along with this childish interaction, the N. Koreans also have a superiority complex to always be bigger and better than the South.

At the JSA, the building on the southern side, called the Freedom Center, had been renovated and another level was added. Upon seeing this addition, the North added a layer to their building to be sure that it was taller. The U.N. quickly prohibited any further additions, in order to prevent a sky-scraper construction war at the JSA. Also, in the picture to the left, you can see the N. Korean village within the DMZ that is named "Propaganda Village", due to the loud speakers that used to play Northern propaganda convincing S. Koreans to defect. On the other side of the line, the S. Korean village is named "Freedom Village", and during the year that the Olympics were in Korea, a giant Korean flag was donated and sent to this village. To match this huge flagpole, the N. Koreans built the tallest flagpole in the world (as seen on the left), and it now holds a 31 meter long flag. Wow, really?.... come on guys, just let it go.

Leaving the JSA behind, our bus then went to visit the set of tunnels dug by the North in order to infiltrate the South. These tunnels were built after the creation of the DMZ and upon completion, would have allowed the passage of 35,000 troops to Seoul (the Southern capital) in one hour. We were able to walk down to the end of one of the tunnels where it had been blocked by the South upon its discovery. It is unbelievable how active the conflict is, even to today. I have always seen the DMZ as an out-dated fued that has mostly passed, similar to the Cold War. The oppression and division remain today. For those of you who are not intrigued by the subject of history and wars, you have my apologies. There was nothing else to write about today, as this trip took us from 6 am until about 4:45 pm, and then we just ate. But for all of you who love Kazakstan, at the end of our tour, since we made good time back to the origin, our guide said "it was great success!" I think I about cried. My best wishes go out to those at CWJ playing hard. I miss you guys and hope the retreat is fun and rewarding. Tomorrow, we are off to East Asia...

More pictures at picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatrip

nate.

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Asian Invasion: Day 6 - "Go & Tell" and STU

Hello again from Korea! Today has been a long day filled with people and meetings, but it has been encouraging. This morning, we set off for the MTC, the missionary training center associated with OMS's church here, to see their new group of missionaries. These individuals have each gone through about 7 months of training, interviews, and examinations. to come to the point that they are at today--commissioning. After intensive preparation, these families have received their country assignments and will be released to raise support and subsequently, enter the field. Today was quite exciting, especially for my Grandfather, as I could see he was touched by the service that these young families have offered to their Father.

The picture to the left shows all of the families who are heading to the mission field, along with their instructors and beneficiaries. It was a significant morning for the Korean church. After the ceremony, we ate a traditional Korean meal, and it was ok. Not awesome, but it was edible, and a little on the bitter/spicy side. I'm glad that they enjoyed it. From that point, we set off to Seoul Theological University (STU), which was started by OMS missionaries about 100 years ago. I was thoroughly impressed by the place, as the campus looked as though a small Christian college was transplanted from the U.S. and filled with Koreans. We first met with the Dean of Student Affairs to discuss the University's centennial celebration.

From there, we went to meet with the President and the Dean of Academic Affairs in the main offices. It is in this meeting that I realized how small the world really is. The president of the University did some time researching at Duke University and attended church in Greensboro! How cool is that? Also, another professor in the meeting had lived in Greensboro for a few years and one of his nephews started a Korean church in the 'boro. I love coincidence. After finishing the meeting, we took some time to walk around and see the campus. The picture to the left is the outside of the music building which houses not only classrooms and practice rooms, but two chapels. One of these chapels is small, but one is larger than Westover, seating over 3,000 people.

It is incredible to consider the masses of people that are in Asia. Seoul is a city of 14 million people, which is many times the population of dear-ole Greensboro. Though the size and quantity of everything here in Seoul is impressive, one thing I miss about America is our easier driving and shorter transit time. Traffic here is intense, disorganized, and incredibly dangerous. I was told today that Koreans only stop at a red light if there is traffic coming the other way. Hmmm.... And, the greatest parts about Korean roads are the scooters going between the cars. When you think it is safe to merge... VROOM, a kindly old Asian speeds past with a wooden crate strapped to the back of his Gold Winds. In fact, I snapped a picture of J.P. and his scooter on the road today (to the left). Anyways, until next time....

More pictures at picasaweb.google.com/nate.tilley/Asiatrip

nate.

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